Yuwie | Oana

Why am I doing this to myself? Do I get pleasure from inflicting pain to myself? These two questions are haunting me for a while and I still can’t get a reasonable answer to them. But more important that what am I asking myself, is why…why am I asking myself this…

First contract I had a good reason. I was assistant waitress for 6 months and in the last day of my contract they offered me the Yeoman position. I had to extend my contract 4 months, but it was well worth the bother. It was what I wanted from the beginning, to get an officer position, and of course I would sacrifice myself and do a 10 months contract. I would have done more than 10 if it wasn’t for me getting a replacement. The scheduler in Miami didn’t send anybody and I was onboard for over 9 months when I decided to choose somebody and train to replace me while I was in vacation. After begging all division heads to give me one of their crew, a good friend of mine, the Inventory Manager, gave me one of his storekeepers to train. I completed his training in 3 weeks and finally left home.

I got a good reason for the second contract too. I was just starting to get used to the position when, after 3 months of being a Yeoman, the Hotel Director asked me if I want to fill in for his admin for a week, until the replacement will arrive. He had problems with his visa and he was delayed for a week. So here I was, doing two jobs, working 12-14 hours a day and trying to please everybody. I guess I was doing well since the replacement never came and I did both jobs for almost 2 months. I was so burned up I finally said “That’s it!!!” I had to recruit another crewmember to be a temporary Yeoman until I finish replacing the Hotel Administrative Assistant and have my vacation. Nobody helped me; I had to beg again the division heads to give me someone to train. This time was the Dining Room Manager, and here I was again, training this assistant waitress to replace me. This time I was lucky enough to go home after almost 7 months.

This time, my third contract, I have absolutely no reason for why I’m doing it all over again except that it looks good in my CV (sort of anyways). I came back from vacation in mid May just to find out that the position has changed from Yeoman, which was something like a secretary, to Food & Beverage Administrative Assistant, which is not just a secretary, but more like and F&B Assistant. What they did was to merge the Food & Beverage Manager Junior with the Yeoman position and create the F&B Administrative Assistant which has the job description of both positions. It would have been ok if the salary and the living conditions would have been on the same level. But guess what? I have to share the cabin, even though I am a two stripes officer, and the salary is under $2000.

Anyways, like most of the managers onboard say it, this is it and this is what we have to work with. So I stopped complaining and just did my job. And then was when I start asking my self those questions: “Why am I doing this to myself? Why do I work 10-11 hours a day? Why can’t I just take the afternoon off and go out just like the others do? What makes me so obsessed with this job?”

Then, when I was on my third month onboard, I got asked if I would like to replace the Hotel Administrative Assistant while she is on vacation. My heart was telling me to say no, to relax, that it’s not worth the bother, but my mind started to calculate the pro’s and con’s and , just like in a dream, I saw myself saying yes. I got out of the office wondering what the hell is wrong with me. It wasn’t something that I wanted or planned to do… Besides, I was suppose to go in vacation in November and sped the holidays with my friends and family. I have no idea why I say yes. So here I am now, doing again a 10 months contract, just because I am a helpless workaholic.

PS: The pictures you see on this post are from when my sister was onboard with her boyfriend. As you might notice, I was wearing the uniform all the time for the simple reason that I was always working. I didn’t even go out with them once…Something has to change! And fast!